top of page

3 Steps to Get Your Sparkle Back for 2020

Updated: Dec 30, 2019

Lately, I have been unable to show up for live Instagram videos for the Sexy Brilliant community. I seem to have lost my sparkle. Truth be told I have been struggling with confidence!

I know right?

You must be thinking: “but she looks so confident, what is she talking about?”

Well, it turns out that it does not take much to lose your way! I do my best to look my most confident even when I am not, and wonder how many of you reading this do the same?

I got a haircut to get rid of my green hair, but after changing my hair to a much shorter cut and style, I seem to have suddenly lost my sparkle from being funny and entertaining. I have also been struggling with depression.

In the world of ever changing technology, showing up on live LinkedIn videos are real, but at the same time they can have the ability to make you feel exposed, naked, and vulnerable, especially when you are not on top of your emotional game!

Between mental health struggles, being overweight—this is the fattest I have ever been—and with the new, short hair, I have noticed my outer confidence has been low. A bunch of other factors including the stress of a hectic startup business, lack of sunlight, being a full time single parent, and juggling all my responsibilities has me lacking the courage to show up on social media!

So I decided to recognise my lack of outer confidence, and as a result have been going through some intensive therapy, which is helping me understand the loss and discomfort I feel.

After months of self-study and personal development work with many professionals, I can confidently claim that contrary to what we may believe, it turns out you can teach yourself to be more authentic, unafraid, and successful.

Here are 3 steps you can use to regain your sparkle in 2020:

1. Knowing that every situation is momentary. Self-awareness is the original sexy.

2. Accepting and acknowledging the feelings you feel now. Feelings are only temporary visitors.

3. Unveil and embrace the change process as it unfolds. Transformation happens in our darkest moment.

+ Bonus Step:

4. Release and let go of your pain by finding gratitude for everything you have learned about yourself. Meet the pain with inner strength and lack of confidence with love.

Have you been holding on to something or hiding behind something?

I realise now that I used my longer hair as a security blanket which gave me the outer confidence to either hide myself or be seen. It was comforting and safe and allowed me to be in control. We should always feel confident - we are so much more than our outer appearance!

We are divine, exactly as we are - long hair, short hair, no hair, even with green hair; we are #Sexy and we are #Brilliant with the power to change the way we see ourselves and to accept responsibility for the choices we make.

What is your way of letting go of the beliefs that hold you back from developing inner confidence and regaining your sparkle?

Let us know in the comments below.

Much love always,



Join the millions of people who are already discovering how to live their most authentic life through practising radical self-acceptance.

To find one of our courses using the K.A.U.R.™️ Method, we invite you to become a member of the #SexyBrilliantAcademy for FREE.


Link to Facebook live video!


263 views3 comments

Recent Posts

See All


Linda Howe
Linda Howe
Dec 11, 2019

Oh my. I just wanted to say thank you. This is my own story. I feel the same way. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings.


Really awesome pointers. I have never hidden behind anything till date. I am upfront and do understand how it is to be in the situation you are in. Being a single parent and taking care of so many other responsibilities will definitely take a toll. I am very happy as you have seen a way out and teach people the techniques to come out. Hats off to you Devina. You are definitely Sexy and Brilliant.


Suzanne Charlebois
Suzanne Charlebois
Dec 10, 2019

I often hold myself back because of wanting to avoid conflict in my personal life, and this is generally just with just a few particularly difficult people.

bottom of page